Monday, Dec 23rd

Is It Kosher To Criticize Your Kid?

I know we all love to praise our children incessantly...oops, I mean give positive reinforcement, but I've wondered before whether as a result of all those gold stars and pats on the head we're actually creating praise-crazy monsters?  Raising their expectations to the point where they will be disappointed if they don't get gold stars from their professors and smiley faces on their business reports? On the other hand, is it kosher to criticize them?

Today my son told me that his class was asked to write about anything they wanted. He wrote a paragraph about how he couldn't think of anything to write about.

I was disappointed in him.

Annoyed.

Angry even.

He is a terrific, creative, imaginative writer and I couldn't believe that was the best he could come up with.

"What about how you just learned to rollerblade? Or, how you had a great visit with a friend you met at camp last summer? Or about the horrificly bumpy flight you had back from Florida when you threw up in a ziplock bag?" I questioned.

Then, I said it.

"You know what. What you did was a cop-out. It just wasn't good and you're capable of better."

Was that a terrible thing to say?

Read more at Gray Matter Matters: